Well, it is slightly a new number. We moved one spot on the overall wait list, and no spots on the special needs wait list.
February was a ssslllloooowww month with our agency. It was sort of crickets on the unofficial group Facebook page, which was a little disheartening. Our agency was being relicensed by Ethiopia, and several of the orphanages that refer to our agency were also relicensing. And, major courts were closed. Amazing the sorts of things you start to keep track of when you are waiting, like Ethiopian court closures.
We've officially been on the wait list for 5 months now, which in the grand scheme of most international adoptions is small potatoes. Sadly, however, I already have that horrible doubt creeping in of "Will this ever happen? Are we waiting with a point? Will we be waiting forever?"
At the end of my pregnancy with Lily, I remember quite vividly telling John that I would be pregnant forever. And meaning it sincerely. Once we hit her due date, I thought - "That's it. Buckle up, Carol, cause being pregnant forever is going to suck." (Overdue, pregnant Carol was not the most rational or likable person ever.) With adoption, there is no due date. There are estimated wait times, but because of our specifications, most of those can even be thrown out the window. It could be next month, or it could be next year, and literally only God knows.
Then, there is the frustrating reality of knowing there are so many children in the world that need families and wanting to be a family that fills that gap. Of course, we want to add to our family and have more children. That makes adoption a win/win for us, because we can add to our family and also help address our world's orphan issue. It is exciting and heart-breaking to feel led in this direction.
And it is so stinking complicated. So many children languishing in orphanages around the world will never even have a chance to be adopted. They will never be "paperwork ready." It is a harsh fate to never have parents, and so many children suffer it. That is a hard burden to start to bear, even in the tiniest way. Waiting has been eye-opening, and for that, I am grateful. My eyes needed to be opened.
Also, while we are waiting, God has provided great work for me to do. I am helping to coordinate the first Walk for the Waiting in Little Rock. (It is ironic that I just realized that I am working on the Walk for the Waiting while I am also waiting. I am sure this was not lost on God. He is in the details, after all.) Be on the look out for more info from me, and please take this opportunity to get involved in this issue locally. I am certainly getting an education on what the needs are here, and it is a whole different eye-opening journey. But, it is exciting to see the Church rising up.
Thanks for following along this journey with us. We appreciate your prayers and look forward to seeing what God has in store for us.