Wednesday, February 04, 2015


Someone once told me that you should determine the number of children you want to have by first determining the number of children you want to serve.  Because that is what you do for your children.   You serve them and love them and pour out your everything for them.  And they take all of it, without question and often, without thanks.

Tonight unraveled slowly and then all at once.  We got home from therapy right at 5, and I started trying to put dinner on the table.  I changed plans midstream.  Then, I decided to sort of make up what we were having (black bean quesadillas with butternut squash), and it took longer than I imagined it would - probably since I kept changing my mind.

I was letting the girls watch TV, so they were mercifully occupied.  The babies have no interest in television, so they were roaming around looking for trouble.  This mainly took the form of William opening drawers/cabinets and emptying the contents at full speed and full volume.  He LOVES the sound of a large plastic plate or tote hitting the kitchen floor.  I love it less.  Violet was joining in on the fun where she could by rummaging through the trash can.

This made dinner prep super fun for all involved.  We did manage to finally sit down.  And - it was tasty, so that was a bonus.  Violet got sick of eating pretty quickly.  She can now get out of her chair and wander around our banquette, which she promptly did.  Then she got down and came over to beg food from John and I, even though it was exactly the same food she had just abandoned on her own tray.

As I looked down, I realized that there was poop overflowing out of her diaper and up her back.  We weren't sure how long it had been there or where else it had been.  John and I left the table to try to clean her up.  Meanwhile, both girls were talking about how they didn't like grapes (not true) and how their stomachs were so full that they might explode like Violet's diaper.  When I went back to check on everyone, I saw that Lily was standing on the bench and that her skirt was covered with Violet's poop, since she had helped Violet get down.

John and a cleaned up V came back to the kitchen where he and I went right on eating our guacamole.  John kept saying, "I am still smelling poop."  After looking over Violet again, we couldn't see any, but then we looked down.  Somehow, we had managed to miss the giant pile of poop in the middle of the kitchen.  The pile that both twins had been walking through.

As Violet bent down to pick some up, we scooped her up for another cleaning while she screamed in protest.  As it turns out, she doesn't like having poop wiped out of her mouth.  Go figure.  Lily appointed herself for the task of walking through the house to see where else poop had been tracked.  Bella sat at the table continually talking.  William walked around looking for something else to mess up.

All in all, we were ready for bedtime.  Really ready for bedtime.  Because I am an awesome parent, I asked Lily if she could put PJs on Violet, not knowing if that was something she would be capable of for several reasons.  As she tried to wrestle Violet into footie pajamas, she said, "This is the hardest job ever!"

Parenting really is one of the hardest jobs ever.  Doing it well is even harder.  And after all of that, we still had to clean up dinner and start a load of poopy laundry.  The work is unending, truly.


Bottom line - I'm thankful that I'm only serving four little blessings at this current time.  I can see that it is sanctifying me on every level.  I have to constantly die to myself and lean on the Lord.  I do not naturally reach the right conclusions or have the right attitudes.  But - by his grace and strength, I can keep going and keep serving and keep loving.  It's worth it.  All of it.  I'm thankful to be able to do the hardest job ever.