OLD STORIES: A REALLY BAD MORNING

There are stories that make up the fabric of our families.  I don't want to lose them with time, as I know will be the case unless I write them down.  So, I decided that I might randomly pull out old stories - good, bad, funny - the ones that help shape who we are today and blog about them occasionally.

This story is about a really bad morning.  Today's morning was not great around my house, because getting two little princesses ready and out the door when they insist on screaming, whining and throwing things is never fun.  The morning I'm going to tell about is from another age in our life - it took place 7.5 years ago.  It was bad.

John and I were engaged, and our wedding was two months away.  We did not love engagement.  We loved each other, but we were honestly just ready to be married.  We were about to head out on a trip to New York City to meet up with some dear friends, stay with John's sister and have a grand old time - getting away from wedding planning and grad school for a bit.  The night before the trip, we argued.  I'm not sure what it was about, but I'm sure at the time that it felt quite important and probably dramatic.  As we parted ways that evening, a little less than amicably, we decided what time he needed to pick me up the next morning to catch our flight.

Let's just say that we were a bit foggy on how much time it would take us to get to the airport.

When John arrived at my townhouse that fateful morning, we both were realizing that we had not really left enough time.  John immediately felt this stress, as well as the stress being piled on from the night before.  I thought we still might make it, if we hurried, and tried to act like everything was fine.  Who wants to be stressed when you are headed out on a fun trip?

So we were driving.  It was still dark - that's how early in the morning it was.  Things were still a bit tense between us, and I started trying to make light conversation, or any conversation really.  I started talking about my cat, Hope.  This cat that we still have that was a brave gift from John the first Christmas we were dating.

Here she is in all of her pensive, Hope glory.  She's a big girl.




I was telling John that I was a little sad about leaving Hope, and that it was a tiny bit of the same feeling that I would probably feel when I would leave a child behind some day.  She had looked at me sadly and known that I was going because of the suitcase, and she was not happy about it.

I glanced at John as I was saying this, knowing that it was a funny comment, but still feeling a little guilty over leaving my cat.  (I've gotten over this.)  At this unpropitious moment, a calico cat, looking just like Hope, but not Hope, ran in front of our car, and we immediately hit it.

I screamed and started sobbing immediately.

John threw his hands in the air and said, "Dear God, Why?"

We didn't go back.  We couldn't.  There wasn't time, and I am squeamish and was already crying rather uncontrollably.  We continued on, in stony silence, punctuated by my tears, still running quite late for our plane.

When we got to the airport, the first parking ticket dispenser wasn't working.  This was only discovered after several people had piled in line behind us, forcing John to get out of the car and tell everyone to back up so that we could go in through the other lane.

We were too late to check a bag once we got to the counter, but they said if we ran, we may be able to make the flight and they would send our bag on the next flight.  We got into the long security line, where we could see the gate.  Because I unwisely asked to be hurried through so we could make our flight, they pulled both John and I from the line and made us go through extra security.  We saw the door close and plane pull away as we headed to the gate.

What a series of unfortunate events.  While we did miss our flight, we were very thankful to discover there was another flight the next hour and that we should make our connecting flight without trouble.  While we did end up having more trouble, we did make it to NYC and had a wonderful, fun-filled trip with friends and family.

That particular bad morning has stuck with us for many reasons.  We try not to cut it close when heading to the airport, which was a valuable lesson to learn early.  We never, ever say things about hurrying when going through airport security.

And, when things on a hurried morning adventure aren't going well, I can look over and say, "Well, at least we didn't hit a cat this morning."

STUFF THAT DOESN'T MATTER & MORE COWBELL

Sometimes I can be a little intense, and it can be nice to get a break from that and talk about stuff that doesn't matter much.  Stuff like my hair.  I got it cut today, which was so nice and very much needed since I can't remember the last time it happened.  I was faced all over again with the funny reality that I want my hairdressing to be all about me and my time table.  I have never been committed to a stylist, but now I have cycled through several in Little Rock, and the guy this morning gave me a bit of a hard time about it.  He is trying to win me forever, and I feel like it might be nice to have someone consistent, but really, I value convenience above all else when it comes to this.  We'll see what I do next time my split ends look like they might be taking over my head.

Last night I cleaned out my purse.  That also seriously needed to happen.  It was so full of crumbs at the bottom that things were coming out of it with a layer of crusty film.  Sick.  Here are those crumbs.



I also found:

A completely flattened off-brand cereal bar.



More pens than one girl could ever possibly need on hand.



Proof that I am a mom.



Stuff that belongs there.  Wallet, keys, lip gloss ect.  Also, my CFA name tag that says "6 years of service," even though it is 9 years this month.  Clearly, I work at the store a lot these days.



Also found but not pictured: coupons that expired in 2010, tickets from several events in the last six months, random receipts, a plethora of church bulletins, napkins in various stages of use, gift cards with money on them that I used last night and last, but definitely not least, a cowbell.



Because we all need more cowbell in our lives.  The object is more interesting than the story behind it, but it has been in my purse for several months now clanging obnoxiously, and I must have had "bursts of laziness" to not have removed it until now.

In other news that doesn't matter, or at least, doesn't matter much, I am using the My Fitness Pal app on my iPhone to track my daily calories.  This has worked well for me in the past, but yesterday I realized that I needed to reset the goals since it was only allotting me 1200 calories a day.  1200 calories a day is not enough for me, and I found myself incredibly hungry and cranky by mid-day yesterday.  The calorie count is set higher now, and my stomach and mind feel much better today.  It makes me much more aware of what I am eating, which is really where I should be anyway.  Since I suck at moderation, it helps me to have a real goal and be doing something to live more healthily.

That will not stop me from eating Fruit Loops, which I have developed quite a strange liking for.



Plus, they are pretty.

Well, that's all I've got right now.  Hope your week is filled with stuff that really does matter, though I do understand the need and desire to talk about the other stuff too.  And I wish you more cowbell.

LAST FRIDAY: MUSEUM OF DISCOVERY & FRIENDS

Last Friday, John stayed home in the morning, and we went to the Museum of Discovery in downtown Little Rock.  We have passes, but I had still never been, because John took the girls while I was in Honduras.  It has been redone and is awesome!



Family fun days are the best, especially when they include lots of play time and a bit of learning.

It has great areas for younger kids that we certainly maxed out, and then it has great places for older kids (or kids at heart), with real learning activities.  Fascinating stuff.  I'm sure we will like it even more in years to come.

That unflattering shot is me on a bed of nails.  I really liked it.

The girls even got in on a little learning.

It's the perfect place to spend a rainy day, or cold day, or really hot day - basically any day that you would rather play inside instead of out.  That afternoon started all the rain of the last weekend.  Rain that we desperately wanted and needed.  Rain that I was glad to have for the change of pace, and rain that I was already sick of by yesterday.  How fickle I am.  I want whatever it is that it seems like I can't have.

Friday brought a sweet baby girl into this world, thanks be to God.  After throwing the shower just last week, it was so fun to meet her beautiful self.  And, as my small group leader put it, the more boys that are already in the family, the bigger the bow must be.  Ava Jane's bow fit the bill - isn't she gorgeous and doesn't Court look amazing?!  Love them.




Congrats, Head Family - we love you guys!

ON BEING HUMBLED

Do you know the hardest kind of tea to drink?

Reality.

(Joke courtesy of a really awesome four-year-old.)

Life is humbling.  The more I live it, the more humbling I find it.

Life is hard.  There are a million more layers to it than I ever realized there would be.  There is so much more gray.  I used to think that things would be black and white and that there would always be a straight path to follow through something that makes sense, but that is just not how it plays out.

I know much less than I think I do.  Truly knowing something and thinking something are two different things.  I have found than I can think a lot of things and even hang my hat on some of them, but really knowing things is harder to come by.  This is good for me, because my tendency in life has been to be a bit of a know-it-all and realizing that I don't, while humbling, helps me live in much better relationship with those around me, myself and God.

I'm very much processing what I'm learning at the moment, hence the reflective, rambling blog post.  I want to be able to wrap things up neatly, but I am finding that often, things refuse to be wrapped.  Things have a way of being stubbornly raw - forsaking any notion of tidiness that I might desire.  While I do not like the mess, I am finding God in it.

God knows my heart even better than I myself know it.  He knows the good and the bad, the pure motives, as well as the selfish ones.  I want to lean more on his wisdom than my own and run away from things I think I know.

"Let no man deceive himself.  If any man among you thinks that he is wise in this age, he must become foolish, so that he may become wise.  For the wisdom of this world is foolishness before God."  1 Corinthians 3:18-19a.

When will I learn that God's thoughts are higher than mine and his ways better?  It seems to be a lesson that I am constantly repeating.  Lord, please give me grace to learn it.