As a parent, I have many opportunities to witness miniature people not getting along. This takes many forms at our house, and sometimes I am amazed at the ways my children look for ways to irk one another.
Here's one scenario: While driving, one girl will be singing boisterously to her heart's content. She will be making a joyful, sort of melodic noise, and she will be quite happy about it.
Now, instead of joining her, the other girl will decide that she needs complete and utter silence. "NO SINGING. STOP THE SINGING. IT'S GIVING ME A HEADACHE!"
The singing child protests, "BUT I LOVE SINGING! I NEED TO SING!"
Silence wanter yells, "MY HEAD HURTS!"
Singer yells, "THIS MUSIC MAKES ME HAPPY!"
Now, I want to scream that my head actually does hurt, but I *usually* refrain. We've reached an impasse. There is no way possible that a compromise can happen when they stand on the opposite sides of the singing cliff. One cannot sing without annoying the other. The other cannot have silence without costing her sister the song. No one is happy, least of all me. I plea for kindness and middle ground, and I get grumps and whines in return.
Why is it so in our nature to fight for our own rights? We are so often so focused on ourselves and things we think we need. As I was reflecting on living in America and all of the rights and freedoms we have, I was thankful. I'm so glad to live in a place where I can worship my God freely and can live a life in pursuit of what I believe he has for us. We live incredibly comfortably. We can say what we want to say. We can think what we want to think. It's a free country. It's not perfect, but in comparison to so many places around the globe, our basic rights are in tact and so much more.
And then I think about the freedom that I have in Christ. I find my identity in him, and I want my life to be a reflection of what he has for me. I want it to point to him. Christ calls us to some upside down thinking, like the "last shall be first" and "deny yourself and follow me." It says nothing about defending my own rights and standing up for myself.
As the culture wars have raged around me in the last several weeks and months, I've been disappointed with some of my fellow believers. I feel like they have been screaming, "MY HEAD HURTS!" in the face of someone singing, when at the end of the day, we are called to love one another and lay down our lives for each other. I don't have to take offense. I am free in Christ.
John and I had a long talk about this is regards to some of my comments about Harrison from my last post on race. He felt like I went too far in saying that I never wanted to stop there and was blaming an entire community for an outspoken minority's billboard. We spent most of lunch a while back spinning this around while also making sure everyone had enough white cheese dip, because our children take chip dipping very seriously.
It feels like we will always be walking a fine line. I feel a strong need to defend my children and use our brains when it comes to what situations we allow them to be in. I also want to model loving sacrificially to them, because I do believe that is what God has called us to. We are to love those who persecute us. I don't think this means that we need to put our children in harm's way intentionally, but I want to be careful not to further stereotypes of large populations of people. I simultaneously want to teach my children to look for the good in those around them and to not judge a person by what they look like or where they live AND ALSO teach them that there are certain things that often come in certain cultures and to stay attentive.
And at the end of the day, I need more of the Lord's guidance. I am still working through the details of what this looks like. I'm thinking that I don't need to fight for my rights - I have all I need in Christ, and I live in a country that guarantees me so much in the way of civil rights. But - I need to speak up more for those who do not have a voice or whose voices go unheard or discarded in the loud discourse. That's where I need to spend my energy.
I can certainly let someone sing, even if it is not what I like. I can only hope we are working towards a place where they also might be willing to stop singing and enjoy a little quiet. I want to carry some optimism with me, because I think defaulting to cynical sarcasm and painting a gloomy picture is far easier than hoping and praying that anything could ever get better. And though I obviously can't and don't influence the whole world, I can certainly do my best to influence my own little portion of it, starting with my children.
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Monday, July 13, 2015
Friday, July 10, 2015
FYE: JULY EDITION
Real life's heavy, huh? Here are a few things that might make you giggle on this Friday afternoon - For Your Entertainment: July edition.
I love big superhero movies. In fact, I actually like them much more than John, probably because my ability to suspend reality is quite well developed. Here's a parody of the Avengers making them out to be rednecks.
And - there's just something about the tryouts for major reality shows that can having me tearing up in no time. Here are three local guys that wowed the judges on America's Got Talent. Clearly, no one expected them to do well, but they are just charming!
For kicks, let's throw it all the way back to when Susan Boyle first auditioned on Britain's Got Talent. Her moving, shockingingly good rendition of I Dreamed a Dream from Les Mis still brings me to tears.
Did you ever see the movie Newsies? I LOVED this movie in my youth. In fact, I loved it and watched it so often that my Dad hid the video to avoid hearing it. Here is a hilarious mashup of a dance scene from Newsies synced to Uptown Funk. The internet does bring us good things indeed.
After seeing this, it inspired me to go onto YouTube and watch the actual Newsies song and dances, which the kids and I thoroughly enjoyed before nap today. Can't wait til the girls are old enough for watching the whole movie!
This retro Sizzler commercial is entertaining on so many fronts. Please take the time to enjoy their promotional video from the early 90s capturing all the reasons that Sizzler is the wave of the future as a "Restaurant within a Restaurant." I'm not certain that it has quite lived up to the hype.
Hope that your weekend is off to a good start!
I love big superhero movies. In fact, I actually like them much more than John, probably because my ability to suspend reality is quite well developed. Here's a parody of the Avengers making them out to be rednecks.
And - there's just something about the tryouts for major reality shows that can having me tearing up in no time. Here are three local guys that wowed the judges on America's Got Talent. Clearly, no one expected them to do well, but they are just charming!
For kicks, let's throw it all the way back to when Susan Boyle first auditioned on Britain's Got Talent. Her moving, shockingingly good rendition of I Dreamed a Dream from Les Mis still brings me to tears.
Did you ever see the movie Newsies? I LOVED this movie in my youth. In fact, I loved it and watched it so often that my Dad hid the video to avoid hearing it. Here is a hilarious mashup of a dance scene from Newsies synced to Uptown Funk. The internet does bring us good things indeed.
After seeing this, it inspired me to go onto YouTube and watch the actual Newsies song and dances, which the kids and I thoroughly enjoyed before nap today. Can't wait til the girls are old enough for watching the whole movie!
Hope that your weekend is off to a good start!
Wednesday, July 08, 2015
13 ON 8: A DAY IN THE SUMMER LIFE
We are in the heart of summer, and I'm surprised to find myself liking it more than I thought I would. We are settling into our groove. Here's what yesterday looked like.
8:40ish a.m.: I was still laying in bed, listening to the girls get the twins up and feed them breakfast. Though this only lasted a few minutes, I enjoyed every moment. Before long, everyone came crashing into my bed with cries and crumbs.
10:45 a.m. - 1:00 p.m.: We made it to the pool with friends. I have such good friends who will help me at the pool. I certainly couldn't do it without them this summer. We had lunch, which included having twinsies all up in my business because they wanted all of my food.
When the Violet wasn't shivering or food begging, she had a blast trying on sisters' goggles and playing. I am such a sucker for children in goggles pics.
Three girls and a boy towel evidence.
We headed home, and I realized that William had pooped in his swim diaper which is really like an over glorified sieve. The towel he was sitting on was soaked in brown juice when I got him out. Ick.
2:45ish p.m.: I took a shower and then spent a while killing ants that have invaded our bathroom through this crack in the grout. I need to call our bug man again, but I just keep forgetting. I can't imagine why they want to come in our house (sarcasm font). I get a bit irrationally angry about ants, and we have dealt with them several times this year in different places. Sometimes I kill them with my finger, and then I flick their little bodies to the floor to stand as a warning for those behind him. So far, this hasn't seemed to be much of a deterrent.
3:45ish p.m.: I worked on a set of cookies with a ton of sprinkles and ended up loving them. I am glad to be on a cookie hiatus, but it felt good to do such a fun set.
5:30ish p.m.: John cames home from work with dinner for the kids and then wound them up by chasing them away from it. They were retaliating with "book shields."
6:00 p.m.: Sitter arrived, and we left for a date night. We tried out a fun new restaurant (Piro) and had a delightful time being able to hear ourselves think and speak.
8:30ish p.m.: We came home from date night pretty early and tucked in to really exciting paycheck stuffing and watching more Tour de France. We are hooked.
9:45ish p.m.: My mom texted me a picture of the shorts she is working on for the girls. I am so excited! And so thankful to have such a wonderful mother.
It was a good day. A normal day. A day filled with whining and fun fully intermixed. A day with a date night - always a good thing. I'm thankful for summer.
8:40ish a.m.: I was still laying in bed, listening to the girls get the twins up and feed them breakfast. Though this only lasted a few minutes, I enjoyed every moment. Before long, everyone came crashing into my bed with cries and crumbs.
10:45 a.m. - 1:00 p.m.: We made it to the pool with friends. I have such good friends who will help me at the pool. I certainly couldn't do it without them this summer. We had lunch, which included having twinsies all up in my business because they wanted all of my food.
When the Violet wasn't shivering or food begging, she had a blast trying on sisters' goggles and playing. I am such a sucker for children in goggles pics.
Three girls and a boy towel evidence.
We headed home, and I realized that William had pooped in his swim diaper which is really like an over glorified sieve. The towel he was sitting on was soaked in brown juice when I got him out. Ick.
2:45ish p.m.: I took a shower and then spent a while killing ants that have invaded our bathroom through this crack in the grout. I need to call our bug man again, but I just keep forgetting. I can't imagine why they want to come in our house (sarcasm font). I get a bit irrationally angry about ants, and we have dealt with them several times this year in different places. Sometimes I kill them with my finger, and then I flick their little bodies to the floor to stand as a warning for those behind him. So far, this hasn't seemed to be much of a deterrent.
3:45ish p.m.: I worked on a set of cookies with a ton of sprinkles and ended up loving them. I am glad to be on a cookie hiatus, but it felt good to do such a fun set.
5:30ish p.m.: John cames home from work with dinner for the kids and then wound them up by chasing them away from it. They were retaliating with "book shields."
6:00 p.m.: Sitter arrived, and we left for a date night. We tried out a fun new restaurant (Piro) and had a delightful time being able to hear ourselves think and speak.
8:30ish p.m.: We came home from date night pretty early and tucked in to really exciting paycheck stuffing and watching more Tour de France. We are hooked.
9:45ish p.m.: My mom texted me a picture of the shorts she is working on for the girls. I am so excited! And so thankful to have such a wonderful mother.
It was a good day. A normal day. A day filled with whining and fun fully intermixed. A day with a date night - always a good thing. I'm thankful for summer.
Sunday, July 05, 2015
CELEBRATING THE 4TH
Since the last year has kept us moving, we decided to keep the 4th low key-ish. As in, we didn't make any big plans. However, John still ended up needing to work for some of it. And, we still have four young children, so most things feel a bit hectic even without big plans. We did dinner out on Friday night and took the kiddos fireworks shopping. We shot off our tiny little fireworks in our driveway to everyone's general delight.
(I love fireworks names. And the fact that treats designed to celebrate America are made in China.)
Saturday morning, John took Lily to run her first full 5K. It's all downhill, so it's a great one to start with, and they give out children's medals. She ran most of it, only walking a little, and had a great time!
John picked up Bella afterwards, and the three of them went for donuts. They brought me one, and I had to hide from Violet as I ate it, because she LOVES them and CANNOT have them because they contain eggs. #allergiessuck
We watched some of the start of the Tour de France, which is one of our favorite summer events. Then, John headed to CFA to help get set up to sell sandwiches at Pops on the River, the downtown LR event with fireworks and fun. We joined him for dinner and partied in the inflatables and near the fish tank.
(I could NOT get a better group picture to save my life.)
The cows got up on stage to lead the Chicken Dance, and John and the girls helped throw beach balls to the crowd at the end. They thought they were big stuff (the girls, not John). You can see them in the bottom left corner of the pic. The twins liked watching the dance and the "COWS!" - it's one of the words they can both say with a lot of authority.
We skipped the fireworks, because John was helping tear down the CFA stuff, and I did not feel like child wrangling alone for at least another hour before they started, all after bed time. Bella was quite distraught when she realized that we wouldn't see the main event and wailed a good part of our drive home.
I am so thankful to live in a country where we have the freedoms that we do. It's easy to take for granted, but when I read the news and realize all of the fights I've never faced, I'm thankful. America is not perfect, but it is a great place to live. I also love the cheesiness that everyone really does embrace. The 4th of July never takes itself too seriously, and I love it for that. I also love dressing for an occasion.
I don't want to pretend like our weekend was all fun and games, because there are simply a lot of moving parts right now that we are responsible for. I'm working to be grateful for where we are, but the fact is, I do miss seeing big fireworks shows and having laid back time. I know we could do it, but the amount of work is really great with very small children - especially with our family weighted the way it is. I know life will not always feel quite like this, and I think it is okay to look forward to some of those things while trying to really take in and enjoy what we do have right now. Life is so very rich. Hope that your 4th was safe and happy!
(I love fireworks names. And the fact that treats designed to celebrate America are made in China.)
Saturday morning, John took Lily to run her first full 5K. It's all downhill, so it's a great one to start with, and they give out children's medals. She ran most of it, only walking a little, and had a great time!
John picked up Bella afterwards, and the three of them went for donuts. They brought me one, and I had to hide from Violet as I ate it, because she LOVES them and CANNOT have them because they contain eggs. #allergiessuck
We watched some of the start of the Tour de France, which is one of our favorite summer events. Then, John headed to CFA to help get set up to sell sandwiches at Pops on the River, the downtown LR event with fireworks and fun. We joined him for dinner and partied in the inflatables and near the fish tank.
(I could NOT get a better group picture to save my life.)
The cows got up on stage to lead the Chicken Dance, and John and the girls helped throw beach balls to the crowd at the end. They thought they were big stuff (the girls, not John). You can see them in the bottom left corner of the pic. The twins liked watching the dance and the "COWS!" - it's one of the words they can both say with a lot of authority.
We skipped the fireworks, because John was helping tear down the CFA stuff, and I did not feel like child wrangling alone for at least another hour before they started, all after bed time. Bella was quite distraught when she realized that we wouldn't see the main event and wailed a good part of our drive home.
I am so thankful to live in a country where we have the freedoms that we do. It's easy to take for granted, but when I read the news and realize all of the fights I've never faced, I'm thankful. America is not perfect, but it is a great place to live. I also love the cheesiness that everyone really does embrace. The 4th of July never takes itself too seriously, and I love it for that. I also love dressing for an occasion.
I don't want to pretend like our weekend was all fun and games, because there are simply a lot of moving parts right now that we are responsible for. I'm working to be grateful for where we are, but the fact is, I do miss seeing big fireworks shows and having laid back time. I know we could do it, but the amount of work is really great with very small children - especially with our family weighted the way it is. I know life will not always feel quite like this, and I think it is okay to look forward to some of those things while trying to really take in and enjoy what we do have right now. Life is so very rich. Hope that your 4th was safe and happy!
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